Thursday, December 23, 2010
This is not medicine or psychology, it is spellcasting. Everytime someone says the word "placebo" they are unknowingly chanting an ancient latin prayer of "I shall please." Like a penny tossed into a fountain, the pill shall satisfy the wisher's unspoken desire.
Placing intent on a physical substance imbues it with power.
Tuesday, December 14, 2010
Being telegenic relies on how the video camera records our unique combination of alluring face, attractive voice, and confident body movements.
Being cybergenic results from self-mythologizing through selective ommission. Many of us have filled in dozens of online profiles like autobiographical MadLibs, and it is inevitable that we start to develop a simplified narrative of our lives. We prune the unsightly twigs until our online persona is a topiary sculpture of our own self-image.
(Artist Alexandre Oudin's Facebook profile. Image via TechCrunch)
Monday, December 13, 2010
Studying the cosmic microwave background radiation, is looking all the way back. Scientists are now observing the instant of the big bang from the inside. Some see evidence of previous univeral expansions. Some see the bruises from collisions with other universes.
What I see is that we all live within the same moment. All there is is the spark at the beginning of the universe and we all play out our lives inside of it. Time is an imaginary dimension within the only event that ever was. From the outside, we have no state of being, only a state of as if.
Sometimes, when I catch myself taking things too seriously, I just look out to the beginning of the universe and repeat to myself, "I am merely hypothetical."
Sunday, December 12, 2010
Isn't the primary appeal of Steampunk to have all of the technological comforts of today, but with objects finely crafted out of brass and leather instead of factory-molded in vinyl and aluminum? Yearning for realities with alternate histories betrays the areas of discontent within our own reality. One of our chief complaints seems to involve a loss of quality craftsmanship.
The ancient Greeks built an eclipse-predicting computer out of finely chiseled bronze and marble, and our modern impulse is to recreate it in LEGOs.
Our current thinking is so entwined with disposability that we have created a computer whose polymers will become brittle and crumble before it's next prediction will come to pass.
In half-assed defiance of our disposable aesthetic, Mobiado is now offering a cell phone made out of marble.
The failure in this particular design is that while the marble facade is built to last millenia, the technology within is outdated by the time it is installed. The permanence of this phone is an sad illusion.
But recognize for a moment that the inner workings of this cell phone can be chiseled in simple perfection from marble and bronze like the original Antikythera Mechanism. You can carry in your pocket a solid, lasting work of functional mathematical art that will last all your days until you pass it on to your son and his son after him. After hundreds of years this phone's call history will tell tales of your genealogy.
There is no good reason all of our tools can't be like this.
A fantastic world waits for us post-planned-obsolescence.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
My Space has razed the vacant and condemned half of it's logo before arsonists could get to it.
Monday, December 6, 2010
(Dr Jekyll and Mr. Hyde augmented reality book by Martin Kovacovsky and Marius Hugli)
(Robert Louis Stevenson's Strange Case Of Dr Jekyll And Mr Hyde represented as a word cloud with frequency of word usage represented in relative size. Via Brainwaves.org)
Language has worn a lab coat for far too long.
Thursday, December 2, 2010
Another friend told me that, working 40 hours a week"at a job you don't enjoy doing work that doesn't enhance your skills is an antidote to universal destruction through huge creative explosions that could be caused by your brain if it were given hours on end to play. Basically, humanity is protected because you are at a job you hate."
Basically, my friends give better compliments than yours, but consider this:
How many times have man-made disasters been averted by distraction? Whose lives were saved by those extra ten minutes they spent thumbing through the Sears catalog? Which political figures should we be distracting now to redirect our future? Are good Spam filters allowing the wrong people to stay focused on their nefarious goals?
Is it possible that the internet is both a catalyst and a retardant for the technological singularity?
Wednesday, December 1, 2010
Secret metadata from our cell phones has already begun compiling a rich 4 dimensional model of every second of every inch of our world. Gradually the existence of this immersive database will leak to the people, just gradually enough to become accepted. Common knowledge will coincide with the extinction of the obsolete concept of privacy.
Google Time Machine will be launched. Recent history will become searchable in the removed, floating, smoothly rotating fashion of Streetview.
Without warning all of Earth's history dating back to the Cretaceous will become available. The explanation will be a pseudoscience involving reflected photons rebounding from particles/planets many light years away and reconstructed into an accurate model. The public will reluctantly buy the story.
Thanks to Augmented Reality, any time period can be overlaid as a skin onto your perception. With the turn of a dial, you can witness any terrestrial event.
Tenses become confused and meaningless. Simultanaeity is redefined.
Just like Google Earth circa 2010, certain sensitive areas are altered for national security purposes. The detonations at Hiroshima and Nagasaki can be relived in every gruesome detail, but JFK's assassination will be blacked out. The bombing of Pearl Harbor is pixellated as to remove specific details. The attacks of 9/11 are tampered with in obvious ways and this is exposed in a worldwide scandal.
The extent of the tampering is called into question. A group of zealots following Philip K. Dick's Exegesis as gospel gain in popularity, denounce all of reality as the "Black Iron Prison", gather in 1980's Orange County to draw wisdom from every twitch and murmer of the amphetamine addicted sci-fi author.
Dick gives subtle clues that he is aware of the crowds surrounding him invisibly, drawing more followers, until at last, Events are altered. Perhaps hacked. Something new happens in the past. The Prophet Dick addresses his followers in a convenience store parking lot, giving a perversion of the Sermon on the Mount annointing the first row with syrupy droplets from the curved spoon-end of his slurpee straw, and announces that all of History has been a lie. Even the world we knew before GTT was an altered overlay. The progression of time is a cruel joke imposed by that program. There is no Time. The world is still. Unchanging. It is/was/has always been the Roman Empire and we the people have always been/are/always will be powerless under their rule.
The sermon happens once, is written down by thousands, but is never searchable again. It continues as a myth. A miracle. A glitch. The last reliable acount of a singly occurring event.
Tuesday, November 30, 2010
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Consider Brian Davis' EULA, an arrangement of a Sony/BMG End User License Agreement sung in Medieval Chorus.
Note that you are not legally permitted to use iTunes to "develop, design, manufacture, or produce missiles, or nuclear, chemical, or biological weapons." But imagine what said weapons would sound like before and after lossy data compression.
Recognize that the EULA has great potential as an art form that is legally binding and dictates the terms of it's own consumption.
Monday, November 22, 2010
Boycott the invasion of privacy if you must, but instead, I recommend you object to the naked photos on the grounds that they are not well lit or framed artistically.
Nevermind that the security agents are trained for neither apprehension of terrorists or maintanance of radiation-emitting medical equipment. Most are also ignorant of the basic elements of photographic composition.
If you must travel, you should at least come prepared and pass out classy nude shots of yourself to the officers. Tell them this is what you're aiming for.
Might I suggest an homage to Ingres' Grand Odalisque?
Thursday, November 18, 2010
It is possible to embrace a wide audience without dumbing your work down, and if we all take this approach perhaps there could be far more intelligence in the mainstream.
There is no prize for being misunderstood.
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Over time, the landscape and creaky carpentry of a local area wears matching grooves into the psyche of the inhabitants. Likewise, The folds of subconscious minds will shape rolling hills and warp aging floorboards into echoes of their geometry. This relationship takes on a will or shadowy form of it's own, which can outlive both the mortals and atmosphere from which it was born. After a creaky old house has been burned to the ground or tenant brutally murdered, the ties that bound those deceased elements can live on, disembodied and eternal.
There is no Headless Horseman without Sleepy Hollow. There is no Shining without the Overlook Hotel.
What ghosts are we giving birth to within the limitless dark corners of cyberspace?
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
Monday, November 15, 2010
As the thin wall between the real and virtual worlds continues to flake away bit by bit, cleverly hidden treasures will appear where you least suspect them. Like 1ups from invisible boxes or warp whistles behind bushes, little rewards are already being programmed onto the face of our earth.
For the seedier side of this phenomenon please refer to http://9eyes.tumblr.com/
Friday, November 12, 2010
You may even learn a thing or two. Closely following illogical thought processes is like cerebral cardio for expanding neural connections and advanced yoga for limbering up creative thought.
Thursday, November 11, 2010
"For the lady wishing to know more about this club host – expect to QR barcodes to be supplanted by facial recognition – still through the mobile phone of course.
The only question is when."
OMG. Those freaky christian end times pamphlets used to warn us never to allow the government to tattoo barcodes to our skin. That's how Satan would brand us as the damned. Well, it looks like our faces will soon be scan-able barcodes!
Suddenly, we recognize the Mark of the Beast and it has always been inseparable from our own human identities.
Checkmate. Devil wins again.
Wednesday, November 10, 2010
Tuesday, November 9, 2010
I am no longer the # 1 Richard Penner on Google. Just type in my first and last names and I compete with the 47 other Richard Penners in North America. But if you search for Richard Penner Time Traveler you will be rewarded with an embarrassing cross section of my of my life on the web. Increasingly, the word of search engines is taken as an atlas of subjective reality.
I'm printing new business cards. No email address, no phone number. Just those four words
Using these 4 words as coordinates you will be able to locate me.
From "The Coney Island Amateur Psychoanalytic Society and It's Circle" at The Coney Island Museum. Curator and artist Zoe Beloff uncovered a collection of reels in which members of The Coney Island Amateur Psychoanalytic Society filmed reenactments of their dreams.
From "Tell The Bees: Belief, Knowledge &Hypersymbolic Cognition" From The Museum of Jurassic Technology in Culver City, California:
The procedure is that as soon as a member of the family has breathed his or her last a younger member of the household, often a child, is told to visit the hives. and rattling a chain of small keys taps on the hive and whispers three times:
Little Brownies, little brownies, your mistress is dead.
Little Brownies, little brownies, your mistress is dead.
Little Brownies, little brownies, your mistress is dead.
A piece of funeral crepe is then tied to the hive and after a period of time funeral sweets are brought to the hives for the bees to feed upon. The bees are then invariably invited to the funeral and have on a number of recorded occasions seen fit to attend.
There are a great many other practices that are observed concerning bees. Among those that know them well, bees are understood to be quiet and sober beings that disapprove of lying, cheating and menstruous women. Bees do not thrive in a quarrelsome family, dislike bad language and should never be bought or sold for money. Bees should be given without compensation but if such compensation is essential, barter or trade is greatly preferable so that no money changes hands.
Both Zoe Beloff and The Museum of Jurassic Technology's curator David Wilson attended film school (Columbia and CalArts, respectively). And, like the members of the Psychoanalytical Society, each seems to have turned their skills toward creating/uncovering meaningful elements of our world that lie in the boundaries between the real and imagined.
Both seem to understand that the essence of filmmaking has nothing to do with filmstock or lighting, casting or editing. Filmmakers do not to create narrative from whole cloth or represent Truth as it is observed. A good filmmaker opens a portal between actual and fantastic realities and accentuates the elements that ring true in both worlds.
An amazing filmmaker does this without a camera in their hand. They rummage through the junk at swap meets, or rifle through fogotten texts, and with their their dusty interdimensional fingers, extract readymade documents from a history that may have never existed.
Monday, November 8, 2010
Be cautious, men. We could easily be replaced by tea trolleys
Perhaps we should be asking ourselves what it is we are really contributing, anyway.
Sunday, November 7, 2010
The purpose of a bookshelf is to keep you from reading every book you own simultaneously, lest your interests merge together into one formless, lifelong experience. A bookshelf separates and organizes a narrative out of your consumed narratives. Alphabetic instead of chronological, it is still a construct like time: an artificial framework on which we file an insane jumble of input into neat, logical order.
But there are many different ways to organize information, and the topology of your life need need not be linear.
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
The following may be footage of a transgendered time traveler attending the 1928 premier of Charlie Chaplin's "The Circus". George Clark, the filmmaker who discovered this ten second bit of footage takes over 8 minutes to explain that he "can't explain it." My guess is that George is not a film editor or screenwriter. Perhaps he's a special effects man.
If she's on a cell phone, who do you think she is calling? How many other cell phone users could there have been in 1928, and how powerful does a cellular tower need to be to cast service 80 years into the past? AT&T had to have charged some serious roaming fees for that call.
Sunday, October 24, 2010
Like the 2 dimensional creatures from Edwin Abbott's Flatland, who were taunted by the god-like beasts from our 3 Dimensional world, invisible someones are toying with us from the higher dimension outside of time. They push and pull the narratives of our lives into different arcs like sculptors, applying and taking away free will from us on a case by case basis as an aesthetic choice.
Our temporal overlords cast shadows in our subconscious, and we secretly aspire to displace them.
Thank you for your spacetime.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
We've got HandiSnacks. You've got Shark Bites.
I'm sure we can come to an arrangement.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Ghosts are zero footprint, but not zero carbon footprint. Ghosts are powered through the energy loss we call drag or friction. Wind resistence is actually matter moving through crowds of disembodied souls as they leach away inertia to fuel their ghoulish missions.
To save our environment I propose we kill all the ghosts.
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Friday, September 24, 2010
Maybe you should have told him/her the truth.
Maybe you should have asked better questions.
Maybe you should have left it alone.
Maybe you should have stretched beforehand.
Maybe you should have just stayed in bed that day.
But after looking at it from the point of view of every detail you can recall, the peripheral stuff just fades away and all you're left with is feeling the impact over and over until there is no more sensation and the wound is healed.
Look straight upward.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
If his plan catches on in the deathcare business, the etched dash between birth and death dates will be replaced by snapshots of vacations and family reunions reanimated to the gentle beat of The Beatles' "In My Life".
It's bad enough that he has had to sit quietly while his ideas have been turned into premises for unsciency sci-fi action movies...
...but now we have Christians praying for his soul and atheists waving his name around like a victory flag over the proclamations of headlines.
"Stephen Hawking: God didn't create universe" - CNN.com
"God did not create the universe, says Hawking" - Yahoo! News
"God Has No Role in Universe, Says Stephen Hawking" AOL News
"Somebody's Going To Hell! Stephen Hawking: "God Not Necessary" Geelkologie
Stephen Hawking: God did not create UFO Digest
Stephen Hawking U-turns on God's creation of Universe" Wired
"Stephen Hawking changes tune on God" USA Today
"Hawking: Religion will be defeated by science" cnet.com
"Stephen Hawking Settles the God Question Once and For All " Discover
My understanding is this: In his 1988 book, "A Brief History Of Time" he said that one's belief in human evolution and faith in a Christian God were not necessarily mutually exclusive. In 2010 he said that the physics of gravity allow for the Big Bang to happen spontaneously, and thus it does not necessitate a God to ignite the first spark.
Neither of these statements reveals anything about Hawking's alleged religious faith or lack thereof.
A super-genius cyborg made a statement regarding the Universe on an inhumanly enormous scale, and journalists turned it into a human interest piece.
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
“You know of course that a mathematical line, a line of thickness nil, has no real existence…Neither has a mathematical plane. These are mere abstractions.”
“That’s all right,” said the Psychologist.
“Nor, having only length, breadth, and thickness, can a cube have a real existence.”
“There I object,” said Filby. “Of course a solid body may exist. All real things..."
“But wait a moment. Can an instantaneous cube exist?”
“Don’t follow you,” said Filby.
“Can a cube that does not last for any time at all, have a real existence?”
I am not a daydreamer. I am an Instantaneous Engineer. I plan and build intricate mechanisms, complete in their gears and function, existing in all 3 spatial dimensions fully formed and yet not materialized by duration. I invent and follow my inventions along their tangent timeline to their logical end and the change/ruin they bring onto society. Then I backtrack to the same moment of conception and pull my creation back out of the world, never to solidify.
My instantaneous creations are devastating so I spin them only onto paper, recount only the vaguest of hints at the destruction they wreak when they endure. I should let them dissolve completely, but in my vanity I doodle their caricatures in tight margins and bury their codex under my pillow to comfort me while I dream dreams I will never recall.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
We both agree that he present is the freezing point at which the past crystallizes out of the future, but what if it isn't instantaneous? What if it happens in a short but gradual duration like the dendritic growth process of solidifying crystals, reaching like angular limbs out of the liquid of infinite possibilities. Steadily the limbs grasp onto each other and grow, solidifying into a beautiful, unchangeable geometric patterns. No pattern can be determined until after the moment has ceased shifting into our consensus reality.This makes me think about how confusing and amorphous the experience of the present is in moments of great change. For instance, during the events of 9/11 I felt like there were thousands of possibilities colliding at once, anyone or anything was responsible for the disaster simultaneously, until a Declaration of Reality was announced on the radio declaring a culprit and the unsteady plasma of undetermined reality cooled into President Bush's desired shape. History was written as such, and time moved on.The question is this: Can we take a pickaxe to the past and crack it wide open again to reflect the future's absurdity onto the past? Can we destroy the solidity of the past leaving us afloat in the undetermined, where all possibilities and impossibilities co-exist?To live in the future is to be many places at once.To live in the past is to be frozen/catatonic/paralyzed.
To live in the present is to live blindly and infinitely.I don't think we have to choose between these options. To be complete and well-balanced people we can switch tracks for differing Time Points Of View. We are able to jump back and forth like switching songs on a record for alternate perspectives on the events that surround us, but we must always remember to return to the present from time to time.Why?The present is the only instant in which we can enact change!And how do we navigate time efficiently in a world where it all looks completely different as viewed from past, present or future.?Picture this: a 4D computer model that maps every possible fissure in the amorphous future. We can now see every concievable outcome of every concieveable choice laid out face up before us like a gigantic deck of cards.Now pick a card.Choose wisely. Look carefully at them all and choose the one that looks like the future you want to live in. Now, in order to make that dream come true all you need to do is trace the path of choices backward to the present and concentrate on making your life match that path as best as you can.Do we already have a program that is capable of such computation?Yes. It's called your brain!
Navigating the desired path among infinite futures is exactly what our brain has evolved to do and it is the exact evolutionary purpose of imagination. So allocate your internal RAM to this application, readjust the settings as choose what shape you want the future of our world to crystallize into.
Got it? As scientists I am sure that you will be able to fold these explosions of concepts into a cohesive and testable hypothesis. I look forward to reading about your results on the web.
Richard R. Penner
Monday, September 20, 2010
The researchers are now practicing gyrating with "a high degree of variability and amplitude of movements of the head and pelvis."
Next, they plan on studying the sex appeal of female dance by dressing women in spandex motion capture suits and having them dance in their lab while they film them; which is, in theory, a much better way for the scientists to meet women.
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
Take into account that he was on performance enhancing drugs for "cool".