Tuesday, February 26, 2013

The Timescanner vs. The JLA

Within his own time stream The Timescanner can see 30 Seconds into the future, which is a superpower that sometimes sounds unimpressive.

It makes him a great sidekick for super speed superheroes. 30 Seconds can be a lifetime for The Flash or Superman.

The Timescanner cannot save the world or fight crime all by himself, but he is a valuable member a Superhero Team as a temporal lookout.

The Timescanner has yelled "DUCK!" or "ON YOUR LEFT!" at every major superhero. Helpful, but he will never win a medal.

The Timescanner isn't a member of The Justice League or The Avengers, but he has been contracted as an hourly consultant for both.

The Justice League once approached The Timescanner to be a full time member, but he could not commit to the hours or agree to be on call 24/7.

The Timescanner is a single father.

The Timescanner tried to explain to Batman that he can only save the world every other weekend when his son is at his mother's house.

Wonder Woman keeps subtly insinuating that The Timescanner's son would be better off being raised by a woman.

The Timescanner had to call in to the JLA during the Rann/Thanagar war because his son had the chickenpox. Hawkman hasn't looked him in the eye since.

Green Lantern keeps asking The Timescanner if he's "gotten any pussy lately". The Timescanner winces and explains he has no time, money, or energy left for dating after parenting, heroing, and working a day job.

The Flash explains, "Look, we know your kid needs you, Timescanner, but you could be doing so much more with your life..."

The Timescanner feels like he is letting everyone down all the time.

The Timescanner often wishes being a great dad was his only superpower so he would never feel the pressure of his lost potential.

Wonder Woman tells Timescanner to buck up. Single mothers do it all the time. "And how many of them think it is easy? The Timescanner replies under his breath.

Once, when Timescanner tried to apologize to Superman, Supes interrupted to say, "you remind me of both my Ma and my Pa. Just do what you gotta do." and flew off.

The Timescanner has a small, noisy apartment he facetiously calls the Fortress of Solitude. It is more of a phone booth.

When not saving the world, The Timescanner falls asleep reading Tintin comics in his son's bunk bed every night at 8pm.

During Brainiac's latest attack on Metropolis, The Timescanner had to cut out early as the sun came up Monday Morning so he could make it to a Parent Teacher conference.

The Timescanner's son suspects his dad's superhero tales are bedtime stories.

The Timescanner tells Son of Timescanner, "What I do when you and I are apart doesn't matter. This time with us together is my real purpose."

2 comments:

  1. oh yeh so its letting me comment :) so yeh love your stuff. <3 very cool indeed.

    ReplyDelete
  2. you didnt let me down, i can tell you that much.

    ReplyDelete